That headline is not a statement, it’s really a question.
How do you get ahead in life without turning into an arrogant jerk? Do you know?
How do humility and ambition mix? Not well, I’m finding.
I spent the vast majority of my early 20′s with a huge inferiority complex. Never thinking I was good enough, always beating myself up for the many failures in my life, never dreaming beyond a 9 to 5 job. I was depressed. Then my wise boyfriend sent me a link to a bootleg copy of “The Secret” (long before it became a big hit and was showcased on Oprah) on my 23rd birthday, and my whole philosophy changed.
I now believe that you can change your circumstances merely by changing your outlook on life. A glass half-full ideology, if you will. By focusing on the positives you open up the door for more joy and positive things to enter your life.
I can get behind this philosophy. It is how I got myself to New York. I set a goal for myself, I believed I could do it and it happened. Everything fell into place.
But the problem is, what do you do when you fail at something? Just ignore it. Move on. Focus on the positive? Really? What about self-examination? What about digging inside and finding out why you failed – and what you can do to change yourself for the better?
I’m so confused! If I focus on the positive – and ignore all the negative, all the nagging voices in my head reminding me that I’m a fuck-wit sometimes – then I can get what I want. I could probably have it all. But do I want it? Wouldn’t that be just ignoring all the yucky stuff inside of me so that I could have material worth in the world? Grrrr …
I have ambition, but do I have humility? I don’t know.
I know that I want it. I want both. I want my own business, but I also desire to walk in humilty, always aware of my shortcomings but never letting them stand in my way.
Ugh. Why can’t this be easier?
